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  Programmer jokes  (Read 124844 times)
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Offline philfrei
« Reply #180 - Posted 2015-11-07 01:41:53 »

I think this thread might be recursive...
Well the longer it gets, the more work is needed to prevent duplication.

music and music apps: http://adonax.com
Offline ClaasJG

JGO Coder


Medals: 42



« Reply #181 - Posted 2015-11-07 07:14:28 »

I found a good thread with jokes:
/topics/programmer-jokes/32483

-ClaasJG

My english has to be tweaked. Please show me my mistakes.
Offline Roquen

JGO Kernel


Medals: 516



« Reply #182 - Posted 2015-11-15 10:09:48 »

Multi-threading
Games published by our own members! Check 'em out!
Legends of Yore - The Casual Retro Roguelike
Offline Roquen

JGO Kernel


Medals: 516



« Reply #183 - Posted 2015-11-16 14:00:20 »

Q: If you have 34 programming bugs and can fix 2 bugs per hour for 10 hours, how many bugs remain?
A: 42
Offline theagentd
« Reply #184 - Posted 2015-12-31 17:40:27 »

Happy new year everyone! My new years resolution is 4K!

Myomyomyo.
Offline NegativeZero

JGO Kernel


Medals: 329
Exp: 1 month or less


Zero but not.


« Reply #185 - Posted 2016-01-08 01:42:05 »

1  
2  
3  
4  
<Sonium> someone speak python here?
<lucky> HHHHHSSSSSHSSS
<lucky> SSSSS
<Sonium> the programming language


Source: http://bash.org/?400459

Offline SkyAphid
« Reply #186 - Posted 2016-04-12 22:18:14 »

SkyAphid's my name and necropostings my game!

Quote
A computer science student was writing a note to his crush before the lecture. The student next to him grabbed the note. The first student tried to grab it back. "You can't see that, it's private!" The second student protested, "But we're in the same class!"

it just werks
Offline ra4king

JGO Kernel


Medals: 506
Projects: 3
Exp: 5 years


I'm the King!


« Reply #187 - Posted 2016-04-13 07:58:38 »

You stole that off today's Reddit frontpage Smiley

Offline Roquen

JGO Kernel


Medals: 516



« Reply #188 - Posted 2016-04-22 06:25:53 »

WTDD: Wishful thinking driven development
Offline delt0r

JGO Wizard


Medals: 139
Exp: 18 years


Computers can do that?


« Reply #189 - Posted 2016-04-22 07:34:14 »

WTDD: Wishful thinking driven development
QFT

Almost every company i have ever worked for use this method. Including the one i just set up myself.

I have no special talents. I am only passionately curious.--Albert Einstein
Games published by our own members! Check 'em out!
Legends of Yore - The Casual Retro Roguelike
Offline CoDi^R
« Reply #190 - Posted 2016-04-22 07:36:13 »

WTDD: Wishful thinking driven development

At a previous job we used "PDD: Pain Driven Development" - prioritize tasks by level of pain caused.

Robotality - steamworks4j - @code_disaster - codi^r @ #java-gaming
Offline Roquen

JGO Kernel


Medals: 516



« Reply #191 - Posted 2016-04-22 08:32:07 »

Well it's a corollary of:  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hofstadter%27s_law
Offline theagentd
« Reply #192 - Posted 2016-08-18 18:13:23 »

Why did the C-programmer never show up at university?

Because he had no classes.

Myomyomyo.
Offline Riven
Administrator

« JGO Overlord »


Medals: 1327
Projects: 4
Exp: 16 years


Hand over your head.


« Reply #193 - Posted 2016-08-18 19:38:58 »

Why did the developer stumble to an ATM?
 - He ran out of cache.









 Emo

Hi, appreciate more people! Σ ♥ = ¾
Learn how to award medals... and work your way up the social rankings!
Offline Ecumene

JGO Kernel


Medals: 196
Projects: 4
Exp: 8 years


I did not hit her! I did not!


« Reply #194 - Posted 2016-08-18 19:41:49 »

100 unfixed bugs on the wall 100 unfixed bugs!
Take one down, Patch it around...
101 unfixed bugs on the wall.

Offline Archive
« Reply #195 - Posted 2016-08-19 01:19:29 »

Why do pre-2000s computer nerds love IKEA?

because everything there needs assembly.

Offline DarkCart

JGO Kernel


Medals: 121
Projects: 9
Exp: 50 years


It's all in the mind, y'know.


« Reply #196 - Posted 2016-08-19 01:37:35 »

Wanna hear a real joke? This thread going away.

The darkest of carts.
Offline ClaasJG

JGO Coder


Medals: 42



« Reply #197 - Posted 2016-09-17 20:18:14 »

A programming language called: C+=.

-ClaasJG

My english has to be tweaked. Please show me my mistakes.
Offline ra4king

JGO Kernel


Medals: 506
Projects: 3
Exp: 5 years


I'm the King!


« Reply #198 - Posted 2016-09-17 23:25:08 »

Oh dear god kill that with fire!

Offline Roquen

JGO Kernel


Medals: 516



« Reply #199 - Posted 2016-09-20 03:40:40 »

Oh my:

Offline theagentd
« Reply #200 - Posted 2016-09-20 17:38:43 »

Not sure if posted here before...
http://i.imgur.com/t3XxgY4.gifv
Wouldn't work with the img tag...

Myomyomyo.
Offline jonjava
« Reply #201 - Posted 2016-09-20 18:16:26 »

Oh my:



I have this book. It's great especially for beginners new to javascript. Although it's a few years old, and doesn't talk about es6 at all, the core concepts still hold up today. Particularly everything and all the "tricks" with closures (function scoping). These aren't secrets but they're certainly foreign to non-functional (programming) people - aka most people new to javascript.

It's written by the author of jQuery, John Resig, circa 2013. The design principles introduced here are industry standard today and you'll find them in pretty much any js library.

I guess the image and title is a bit silly, but the author is moderator of both the /r/javascript and /r/ukiyoe subreddits (/u/jeresig)

Offline DarkCart

JGO Kernel


Medals: 121
Projects: 9
Exp: 50 years


It's all in the mind, y'know.


« Reply #202 - Posted 2016-10-06 01:09:46 »


The darkest of carts.
Offline Archive
« Reply #203 - Posted 2016-10-06 01:50:51 »

This is not my creation (it's also a pretty old one):

Titled "Every StackOverflow Thread Ever"


Read the side stuff like the adverts, the creator added some funny stuff.

Offline DarkCart

JGO Kernel


Medals: 121
Projects: 9
Exp: 50 years


It's all in the mind, y'know.


« Reply #204 - Posted 2017-01-09 18:38:50 »


The darkest of carts.
Offline ra4king

JGO Kernel


Medals: 506
Projects: 3
Exp: 5 years


I'm the King!


« Reply #205 - Posted 2017-01-11 00:41:50 »

That XKCD's alt text: Neal Stephenson thinks it's cute to name his labels 'dengo'

Offline Archive
« Reply #206 - Posted 2017-01-19 20:53:24 »

actual definitions i found from the back of the 1997 OpenGL redbook

Offline DarkCart

JGO Kernel


Medals: 121
Projects: 9
Exp: 50 years


It's all in the mind, y'know.


« Reply #207 - Posted 2017-02-05 18:39:58 »


The darkest of carts.
Offline nsigma
« Reply #208 - Posted 2017-02-05 18:49:32 »

@DarkCart or from the other side  Grin ...

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/gLDFQ_IhnDc?version=3&amp;hl=en_US&amp;start=" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/v/gLDFQ_IhnDc?version=3&amp;hl=en_US&amp;start=</a>

Praxis LIVE - hybrid visual IDE for (live) creative coding
Offline SHC
« Reply #209 - Posted 2017-02-05 18:50:10 »

... snip ...

You must watch this:

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/RnqAXuLZlaE?version=3&amp;hl=en_US&amp;start=" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/v/RnqAXuLZlaE?version=3&amp;hl=en_US&amp;start=</a>

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