is looking for a new MINION to join our tiny boutique studio. Briefly the perks comprise of:
1. Working from home.
2. Working your own hours.
3. Writing games for iOS.
4. Working for an award winning, renowned studio.
5. Generous holidays.
6. Being surrounded by beautiful women.
Only one of those statements is possibly untrue.
The conditions, disadvantanges and small print of your employment are thus:
1. Miserly pay. We don't have lots of cash but we've got enough to pay you a frugal living.
2. You've got to be a UK taxpayer. Where you actually are we don't care.
3. Your first job will be to port all our games to iOS, which is not as exciting as it sounds.
4. Only later will you get to do interesting stuff.
To this end we seek solicitations from UNIVERSITY GRADUATES with a PORTFOLIO OF GAMES PROGRAMMING EXPERIENCE on iOS who is able to attend an interview in Taunton within the next 3 months. You might not necessarily be a graduate, but then you'll have a really great portfolio consisting of at least one FINISHED GAME. It would be extraordinarily beneficial if you are proficient in Java, OpenGL, and maybe C++ or C as well.
Please email your CV, either a URL, .doc, or .pdf, to email@example.com
with the subject "MINION". Please include hyperlinks to any stuff we can check out online such as demos or video, and also include a covering letter saying what your salary expections might be so we can have a good chortle.
I'm afraid we CAN'T AFFORD AGENCY FEES so if you're a pimp, I'm afraid you won't get lucky this time around.
If after all the UNUSUAL JOB ADVERT HONESTY you still aren't put off then this might be the job for you!
Director, Puppy Games